A novelist writes about the mind, body and soul.

Archive for the tag “cigarettes”


Smoking is evil and vile and cigarettes stink. They also kill you. I know this, we all know this, and yet some maverick, rebellious characters carry on doing it. You see huddles of them crowded outside parties, or office blocks. Sometimes they look as though they are in a secret, conspiratorial club and they are laughing. In winter they shiver and stamp their feet, which doesn’t look so much fun.

I am a smoker, who is on the brink of giving up forever.  The first time I stopped smoking, about two years ago, I was hypnotised by a woman, who gave me a CD to play afterwards.  I went to two hypnosis sessions and I listened to the tape, and  using a lot of will power, I managed to give up. Instead I ate all the children’s sweets.  After a few months, I noticed my husband had given up in sympathy, but I was slipping. I would have someone else’s cigarette at a party, but my husband wouldn’t budge. He was now a non-smoker and he hadn’t even been hypnotised

I only have one cigarette a day and I usually wait until the children go to bed. They point out that people die, they wave their hands around and grimace if they catch me out. “You’ve been smoking,” my daughter says when she smells smoke on me.  My husband tells me to go and smoke outside. Everyone hates it and me for doing it. Just this morning, I threw a pack of ten in the rubbish. Yesterday I forgot to go to my giving-up smoking appointment at the chemist. For three days before that I listened to my Georgia Foster hypnosis tape and I was fine for a few nights. My husband came back from tennis one evening and found me listening to the words, “no thank you, I am not a smoker, no thank you I am not a smoker,” being said over and over again on the hypnosis tape, which is what I am meant to say when someone offers me one.  He got the giggles and then I did and the whole thing ground to a halt.

I am going to listen to the tape again, and again, and again. I have to actually admit that I am not a smoker, because at the moment, I feel that I am hardly a smoker which is no good at all. Anyone have any tips?


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